i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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