I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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