I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
