Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
