she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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