Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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