fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
