if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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