I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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