First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Are we still banned from the library?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
