rhymes with "ouble enetration"
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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