There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
