there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Randomize