you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship