I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
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shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
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Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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