i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
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