They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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