Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
