My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
