There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
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