Well apparently he's into motor boating.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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