The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
