I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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