I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
