Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
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Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
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If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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