But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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