A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
