I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize