1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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