I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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