i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Let's paint friendship bongs
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize