And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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