You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
