you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
