dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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