Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
