I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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