uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Randomize
