I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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