that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
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He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
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Your cock deserves a montage
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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