god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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