saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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