Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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