It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
