Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Randomize
