Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
