For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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