I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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