what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
