...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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